When I’m traveling, it’s not out of the ordinary to see other women going places either flying solo, with their friends, their partner or even their family. It’s a beautiful sight to see. Women going on flights to take off and pursue business, adventure, and even recreation and fun. It inspires me to see women who are determined they’re going somewhere in life. You can tell if you’re going somewhere in life when you don’t need an alarm clock to wake you up everyday, because you’ve found your passion. You can tell you’re going places when you have more than a job. A job is something you do for money and that’s the only reason you’re doing it. Ha! But a woman who’s going places in life pursues purpose over a miserable job. Purpose is something you do whether you get paid or not. It’s the motivation of a person who’s found their reason for existence. The most miserable thing to see is a woman who’s bitter, resentful and frustrated because she’s never gotten to her desired destination. I’m not sure exactly what happened in the lives of some of these women out here who try to keep other women grounded and stuck in one place, especially since it’s a wasted effort. Women who are going places can’t be stopped and they certainly don’t need the validation of other people. The bottom line is, a woman who’s clear about where she’s going will never be stopped by a hater (insert can I get a witness).
Women hating on other women? This is not the way it’s ever supposed to be. It is my belief that women, young and old should be able to stand with one another and show genuine support in each other’s collective and individual elevation and ascension. Ask yourself, am I that kind of woman? Unless you’re not a woman. lol. Next ask yourself, how do I help the other women in my life go higher? I’ve found a lot of women spend so much time trying to prove that they’re superior to other women and they never actually grow beyond a middle school mindset. Trying to prove you’re smarter, prettier, happier is a waste of time and energy. And besides no one is convinced. Move on and help someone instead of feeding your narcissism and excessive need for attention.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of insecure women who compete, contend and rival with their sisters. Why would you be unhappy about your sister taking flight in life unless you feel frustrated in your own efforts to soar. But we see this destructive behavior in women using their femininity irresponsibly by messing with other women’s husbands and boyfriends; yuck. Signs of a sister who wants to stay on the ground and never take off in life. We see the unhealthy behavior of women who backstab and play mind games with other women to keep them from getting connections, business and making progress; disgusting! It’s insane and tragic to see. This kind of toxic behavior keeps the overall view of women as a whole from going beyond the negative stereotypes of us all being called overly emotional, passive aggressive, nice nasty women. The mean girl, housewives and love and hip hop examples on television that glorify calling each other the B word have literally distorted the reality that women are actually beautiful, highly intelligent, creative, wise creatures with more to offer than loud over the top argumentative viewpoints, sex, and domestic invention.
Obviously, there are countless women going places in life who don’t fit into the cultural generalizations we’ve been pegged to fit into. I personally know lots of women (including myself) who aren’t about a bunch of drama and foolishness. Women who genuinely carry themselves with dignity and class. Not perfect, but working on it. Women determined to be authentic. Proudly, there is still a large number of women who don’t have low self esteem and a poor view of themselves or other women. There are still many women out there who know how to handle people and their relationships well and when they don’t, are able to admit when they are wrong. Is that you?
Truth is, getting to our next level is not without difficulty. Going places and getting to our next destination is not so easy for women. All of us have seen (or been) the woman out there who’s trying to travel, but she’s not ashamed to say she’s struggling to get there.
Let’s be honest, challenges come in all kinds of shapes and forms and they’re not all the “devil.” Sometimes the biggest challenges we face are the things we actually prayed for. The woman traveling with a kid and a family gets to board first, but it’s only because traveling with a family brings a whole new dimension of demands.
The challenges women face speak to a harsh reality that it’s almost always harder for women to take off in life, especially when we try to fly with a family. Sure it’s the American dream, but many women get caught up in a life that looks a lot different than what they fantasized about. Let’s be real, having a husband and kids and trying to get to your destination is a difficult juggling act for even the average superwoman. How is it possible to have a successful career and still make time to clean the house, cook healthy meals, drive the kids to school, go to every doctors appointment, sports event, support your church, community group or whatever else, keep your husband happy, add income to the family and do all this without sacrificing your sanity? It’s overwhelming being a woman!
I’m in no way doubting that doing it all can’t be done, but that still doesn’t make it easy. So, I want you to consider how you can help make the lives of women around you better? Even if you begin as a woman by thinking of ways to make your own life better. How can you begin to treat yourself more like a treasure? Write down 10 ways you will be better to yourself.
The demands on women are somewhat overwhelmingly obnoxious! We live in a society where women are expected to do all the work of a man and take less pay. We’re expected to push an entire human being out from a very limited area on our bodies and still get back to work in 8 weeks yet we’ve been called as the Bible says “the weaker vessel.” Now I’m no theologian or anything, but nothing I described about a woman sounds weak to me.
The truth is, this whole weaker vessel note about us actually stresses the real responsibility of men to handle us with more care. Women need men who are committed to handle them a lot more gently than we’ve become used to being treated. It’s no wonder then that we call certain men in our society gentlemen because their actions prove they’ve learned the art of treating women with a gentle touch.
At the end of the day, the way I see it; women are super strong! All too often, it’s not because we want to be strong, but because we have to be. You think we want to wear all the hats we have to in a day? In a matter of 24 hours, we are expected to be doctor, teacher, banker, chef, driver, secretary, referee, coach, therapist, motivational speaker, pastor, FOR FREE,….and on top of that, most of us never get a moment to rest and restore our own minds and spirits. If you asked me, this is not how a weaker vessel or treasure should be treated. Yet, we live in a society that calls us queens and goddesses and handles us like a piece of trash when we look at the way are efforts are often not appreciated. The tragedy in all of this is that many women just go ahead and accept this as the way it’s always going to be. Many women handle their mistreatment in silence. On this International Women’s Day, my advice to you is speak up and stand up for yourself and do it like a woman in all her glory! Take pride in all you offer and don’t let anyone devalue all you are to your family and community.
If you’re not a woman, go out of your way to treat the women in your life better. Open her door, pump her gas, carry her bags, pay for her meal, listen to her heart, make time for her and not just so she can serve you; but this time do it because you see the gift she is to the world.
The world is a beautiful place because the women in it add beauty to the spaces and places they arrive in. Truthfully, a lot of women out here have had some rough lives to get to where they are today and yet the beauty they are still able to effortlessly exude is nothing short of a miracle. Women have the ability to carry a tremendous amount of responsibility, pain and pressure and too often never find healthy places and people they can release what they are carrying. Women need safe places to share their heart where they can be transparent, valued and honored. Make today the day where you become that safe place for a special woman in your life. Be that person that makes it your business to value the beautiful women around you. There are women who are really going places! Why not help them get there? Help them with their baggage and try to make this journey a little easier for them along the way.
If my articles have in anyway shape or form blessed you or even vexed you, please take a moment to leave me a comment. Also, please feel free to share these with your family, friends, co-workers, and neighbors on Facebook, Twitter, or whatever social media platform you choose!
Copyright 2019 Sherry Grant
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