A pilot must have 20/20 vision, with or without corrective lenses, to become a civilian airline pilot.
This immediately made me think about how important the vision and perspective of anyone going somewhere in life has got to be on point, especially when you’re the one carrying precious cargo and your hand is on the proverbial wheel of leading other people in life.
When you begin to think about how a pilot carries the enormous responsibility of taking people from one place to the next; it’s such an amazing assignment. So, for anyone to sit in that seat of leadership and not be focused and clearly able to see correctly, that’s some very dangerous and reckless behavior. This is why we must all do a thorough investigation into the lens of our hearts; because often what motivates us can easily blur our vision and the course we set for our lives and the lives of other innocent people.
I encourage you to write down the three motivations as to why you want to lead or influence other people. Also, ask yourself; Am I someone who’s leadership I would want to follow? If not, work on correcting your character flaws and the gaps in your integrity that make it hard for people to trust you and respect you. Are people really following you or are you delusional aka someone with a title only? Who is it that I’m actually leading?? Write their names down and to what capacity you lead them.
The bottom line is, you must be honest enough to admit that it’s not a joke or something to take lightly that you’re the leader; the actual person who’s influencing and guiding people through various seasons of their lives. Furthermore, don’t you think these people deserve to have someone steering them through this incredible journey who’s spiritually, emotionally and mentally stable? Don’t you think they deserve a pilot who has more than good intentions??
Many people go through life and they excuse their bad behavior by saying things like, “My heart is in the right place!” & “I don’t mean any harm, I’m only trying to help.” I personally think people deserve more than that. I believe people deserve leaders who are sane, normal, solid, clearheaded, well balanced, competent and clear about where they’re directing others. Just take a moment and think about the insanity of a pilot who knows he or she can’t see, but still has the nerve to take off and fly a plane with a bunch of innocent people in the seats and he or she does it because they mean well. That’s corrupt leadership! Good intentions and blurred vision at the helm will harm a lot of naive people. This is why it takes more than loving someone to actually lead them. As a matter of fact, sometimes it is the deep love that you have for people that makes it darn near impossible for you to see things correctly. For someone to take people places, they have to to be level headed and sober. Love sometimes makes it difficult for people to think clearly. The other component love blurs is being able to lead people for the right reason. This speaks again to your motivations! If you’re leading them because you love them, you will often make decisions that aren’t helpful to your loved ones long term growth and development. Meditate on that part for as long as you need. Don’t ignore it.
Ask yourself, are the people I’m “leading” going anywhere? Or are they still in a place of needing me for everything? If they can’t make simple decisions without calling you that’s a sign somethings wrong. If they need your advice and involvement before they make a decision, you’re not a leader, you’re more like a glorified babysitter and your role needs to change today starting with you and your mindset. My kid is 16 and she is in drivers ed. Even now, when we are together she is the one driving, not me. And in a few weeks when she gets her license, she will be driving her car; not my car. Notice there is a natural progression that takes place when we actually lead people authentically from a right perspective. A good leader leads people to a place of independence. A poor leader leads people to be more dependent on them. In most cases, the type of leader who needs people to depend on them for “life” actually suffers from a term we use in psychology called codependency which is basically an excessive need to be needed. This is a clear sign that your vision is jacked up and completely impaired. This flight we are on called life is about helping people get to a certain spot and then letting them go so they can soar to new heights. My advice to you today is, check your vision. If the people you claim to be leading keep sitting on your plane and never get off, something is wrong. If you get your jollies off of them needing you; you need help. In real life, airplanes aka vehicles that help people get to their destination need to be refueled, they need cleaning, repairs and maintenance; this is why they deplane, on top of the fact that they have not accepted a lifetime responsibility for carrying people around (insert speaks in tongues!).
Anyone with a clear mindset and pure motivation for doing whatever they do for others understand that leadership is influence, but not control. Unfortunately, I’ve observed too many people taking flight with others controlling them in the name of helping them. If you lead people to control them, check your vision. If you lead people so they can depend on you, that is bad piloting. You are risking people’s lives flying that way, and even Stevie Wonder can see that you can’t see.
You know you aren’t seeing properly when you’re leading people nowhere. You know you aren’t seeing properly when you’re more interested in being the leader by title and position than you are with actually helping them get to their next phase of life. If you have to keep throwing around your title, “I’m the mom, I’m the dad, I’m the one who takes care of you,..” you’re not doing it right.
Sure, when we want to help people we may give them our couch to sleep on if they’re down and out. But the couch has a time limit on how long they’re actually allowed to sleep on it. People going places don’t move into a leader’s house without a set date for their take off! You don’t allow people to stay on your team who are exhibiting toxic behaviors and you not hold them accountable for it and give them a plan of action for moving forward. Leaders don’t come into people’s lives to make them comfortable, they come to make them better. They come to help them ascend and get somewhere faster than they could if they tried it on their own.
On the contrary, leaders know their limits and set them. They understand boundaries and don’t try to play god with the people they’ve only been called to guide. It’s a sad thing when our vision becomes so clouded that we do the same dysfunctional things we’ve had done to us to the people we are called to impact positively. Navigating people to a point in their life is one thing, but trying to fly them everywhere and steer them in every direction that suits us is another thing. I encourage you to check your vision today. Get a good vision screening from someone who’s not afraid to make you accountable. Talk to someone who’s not afraid to tell you that your perspective needs to be adjusted. Also, you need to commit to having routine vision checks. The truth is, you could mean well and your heart could be in the right place. But at the end of the day, you could think you see better than you actually do; and no one wants or needs to be led anywhere by a person who can’t see properly.
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Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant
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