One of the most stressful moments of flying for me is who’s going to sit next to me? And don’t you dare sit there and judge me for saying this because you were thinking it too! It can be so suspenseful. Who will it be? And while you wait, you sit there and hope and believe you’re going to have a reasonable person sitting next to you. You get comfy and relaxed and even put your headphones on and your neck pillow and you’re ready to have an enjoyable flight.
And right when the flight attendants start closing the overhead cabin bins, here they come. Mr. or Ms. Annoying; and where are they going to sit? No. Please not next to me. (Relax Sherry) There are at least 16 other open seats on this flight. It’s not a full flight. But O no 🙄 They can’t be coming over here. “Hi, this is me!” they say. And yep. Just as you suspected,….they sit right next to you.
Well, if you’re like me you try to think on the positive side and say this person can’t be but so bad. But of course they can. And they are. And because I grew up to believe that God has this strange sense of humor and everything that happens to me is somehow supposed to be teaching me some lesson to make me suffer for my greater good; (Inserts 📝 I’m seriously working to unlearn that warped idea of how God wants me to suffer through life! Now I’m choosing to live abundantly😊)
Where was I? Instead of me getting up and sitting in one of the 16 empty seats on the plane; I actually stay and suffer in silence and endure the entire trip in the name of being a good person.
Anyway, after they step on your feet and you dodge their wide behind from literally swiping your face, they plop down into the seat next to you and proceed to make your flight the nightmare you prayed it wouldn’t be. But it’s actually happening and you feel like you can’t speak up. So you just sit there. At least for this trip. And you start talking to yourself in your head “Self, you can endure this. You can just take a nap. Just close your eyes and sleep through this!” And right then and there they take out an egg salad sandwich on an onion bagel and a bag of crunchy potato chips and they go at it; eating and spitting food out of their mouth the entire time while talking loudly to you about everything from politics, to their love life, to their 6 cats at home, to their medical condition, to growing up without love and Donald Trump and the wall. And in the midst of you not listening to a word they’re actually saying; you think I should have moved my seat.
Wow! How much better would life be if I would have just moved my seat. How many regrets would I have never had; if I had just moved my seat. It’s not that I would have been running away from anything. I would have actually been running to peace! Running to clarity. Running to atmospheres and environments that energize me. But instead, I’ve allowed myself to stay when I should have moved my seat. Every time someone made me feel unworthy of love and acceptance; I should have moved my seat but instead we have learned to sit in places we know we aren’t valued. It took me to get to 46 to realize I have a right to sit where I want.
On a plane sitting next to people who don’t know how to respect the people around them is a lot like life. We would have saved ourselves a lot of unnecessary drama and stress on this flight called life if we had the courage to just get up and move. And isn’t this the same truth we need to realize in our own lives? Why partner with people and stay in places where we are suffocating dealing with those who don’t understand us? The people who we have nothing in common with?
Like when you sit on the plane and someone behind you kicks the back of your chair the entire flight and you twist and turn, sigh and groan and roll your eyes and mumble under your breath but never say “Excuse me, you’re making this flight unbearable for me. Could you please stop doing that to me!”
Wouldn’t your journey be so much better in life if you stopped grinning and bearing things that are driving you crazy? Wouldn’t it be a much better flight if you asked the people around you to respect you and they actually listened and honored you. And if for some reason they didn’t want to, you got up and moved your seat. How much freer would you feel if you moved and didn’t care what they said about you?
Some of us have talked ourselves into enduring a lot of crap we shouldn’t have to and said to ourselves; it’s only a flight. Once I get “there” I’ll enjoy myself. But the quality of your journey is measured by the people sitting next to you.
Of course people are people and some of them will irritate, provoke and distract you. You irritate, provoke and distract some people. I know I do. But some people will (intentionally or intentionally) keep you from being as productive as you could be and it’s your job to protect your heart on this journey. It’s your job to stay in purpose. Our connections can either bring out the best or the worse in us. So as your real life coach my advice for you today is; Make sure you’re not traveling through life convincing yourself you don’t have a right to enjoy your journey.
You have a right to have a great ride!
And you can either sit there and suffer. Or you can speak up and demand respect from the people sitting close to you. Your family. Your friends. Your boo. Your community. You have a right to demand respect. And if the people close to you keep kicking your seat, you can move to a different seat and pray when you get there you don’t sit next to someone even more annoying. But even if you do; you are not without the power to do what you have to do when you need to.
Copyright 2019 Sherry Grant
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