You ever just been completely shocked?!! Like honestly not even expecting that. I’ve sat there and thought there’s no way they did that. No way! When you deal with the utter disbelief, you sit there mouth wide open, eyes completely bulging out of your sockets, mind absolutely blown. That’s what happens when you give people the benefit of the doubt and put away your preconceived ideas about them and they turn around and do something that you can’t even believe. You help them and they act as if you didn’t do anything good. It blows my mind that most of the conflict we have in our relationships on this flight called life results from something called “people have the nerve!” They have the nerve to take your kindness for weakness. They have the audacity to hold you to a standard they don’t live up to. They sit back and judge you when you extended grace to them time and time again. Mindbaffling!
Honestly, this world would be a much better place if all of us got off of our high horse and stopped being so hard on one another. If you spend any amount of time around people you’ll begin to see how hypocritical they are. How they hold one person to such high standards that they don’t hold for themselves or others. What makes you expect all of this effort from one person while allowing the rest of the people in your life to be the losers they are? It doesn’t add up.
I have simply learned to remove myself from this whole idea of needing to understand why people behave the way they do. I am learning more and more to mind my business and let people do what they do while simultaneously telling them to leave me alone and worry about themselves! I sincerely don’t even care anymore what people think about me. They can think what they want. Shucks, it’s not my business what you think or say about me. Seriously, I don’t care to know what anyone has to say about me behind my back. If they’re talking about me from a place of dishonor and don’t have the decency to tell me I’ve actually done something they don’t appreciate, why should I care? And what gives them the right to sit back and assess me anyway?? That’s the main reason I don’t care. If you’re going places in life and you are, here’s a little piece of advice that will help you stay sane on the way to greatness. Don’t even take what people mumble and complain and say about you behind your back personal. I don’t. If you’re dealing with someone mature, they’ll learn to respectfully speak to you about their concerns and negotiate a better way to coexist. The alternative is talking about me behind my back to a bunch of other nincompoops. Not at all honorable. How about you change? Leave my presence. Go find people who act the way you want. After all, why do you need to control me anyway?
Most of the critics in my life are not ever going to have the courage to say what they say behind my back to my face. For real! First of all, they lack the conversational skills, maturity and integrity to speak to me one on one like an adult. Second, they have issues too. All of us do. So what makes us so consumed with trying to fix other people? That’s why what I do in the meantime is simple. I worry about myself. I certainly don’t plan on going into a shell, or a bubble. I don’t plan on becoming insecure and unsure about myself because of passive aggressive people. I refuse to be bullied by toxic people who pose as friends and family. That’s not going to happen.
The last suggestion for my real life coachable friends is – Don’t waste your time trying to get manipulative people to change. They don’t have the capacity to be upfront and honest. They lack the character and transparency to approach you with candor and credibility. So, their pattern of continued back biting and toxicity continues, just make sure it’s not with you. Stop giving them access to you the more they prove they don’t have the capability to respect you. While they’re sitting around being rude and obnoxious, we are busy growing and going places. We are moving forward and getting better. This might sound funny to you, but I actually think negative people who try me and fail are the ones helping make me prettier! They’re increasing my giftedness and anointing. The more I elevate in their face, I think they are literally making me look younger and feel better. So let them talk. Don’t get upset when people sit around you benefitting off your favor and sneakily trying to put you down. There’s something called Karma and it will come back and bite them in the butt when they least expect it. Watch the seeds you sow. They will come back and give you a harvest. Plant good stuff in your garden and become less and less shocked by toxic people and the nerve they have.
Copyright © Sherry Grant 2020
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