Everyone on the flight with you is going somewhere, but not all of the people flying with you are going to the same destination. Just because you both leave from the same place, it doesn’t mean you’re going to land in the same location. This is why it’s important for you to develop your own identity on this flight called life. You must learn to be an individual!
As much as I love my family and friends, I don’t share the same brain and heart as they do. I have my own thoughts. I have my own plans. I have my own ideas. Too many people are out here looking for similarities in relationships and in the process they are subsequently losing their own sense of individuality on this journey. If you never make your own unique contributions in life and if you never share with others your own perspectives; when will the world ever benefit from your existence? As long as you continue to spew out the same ideals and thoughts you’ve heard from your parents and family of origin, you will never make your own mark in this world. Where’s your individuality? Do you actually believe and agree with everything people around you believe? Do you all really genuinely share the same perspectives on everything? That can’t be true! In the movie “Coming To America” the Prince was set to marry a woman his parents selected for him. When he finally met her, he didn’t want to marry her until he was able to see if they were compatible. Well, it turns out she didn’t have a mind of her own. She was brought up only to say what he wanted to hear. This was a major turn off to him because he wanted to spend his life with someone who had their own thoughts and ideas. Anyone going somewhere in life is looking to be stimulated by conversations and relationships that are based on different views and concepts. Sadly, too many people are so busy trying to impress people that they never reveal their true identity until it’s too late. People do a bunch of pretending to make connections that never stand a chance because they’re not real. And so, the importance of knowing who you are can’t be stressed enough on this flight called life.
While a lot of people in your past have been significant in contributing to who you are up to this point; at this age, isn’t it time you have some thoughts of your own? Isn’t it time you stop checking with your family before you make every little decision? Can you admit it’s becoming a bit too much? The need for validation is killing you. At the end of the day, they can’t sit with you. Not where you’re going! They have to have their own place on this flight and so do you.
After all, if this is in fact your life, when will you ever live it? If this is your marriage and your family; when will you ever enjoy it and have your own experiences free from the influence of how everyone else in your ear thinks you should live it? Good counsel is good, but too much of anything is bad. Too much involvement and advice will always have an adverse effect and make people weak and needy. Too much family involvement and advice from friends can create a codependency that leads to disaster and unnecessary drama. My advice today is simple. Be an individual and allow the people in your life to have their own individual mind and make their own decisions. Don’t second guess the people in your life. If you’ve contributed to who they are, let them go. Let them fly and live their lives with nothing more than your blessing. Sure they’ll make mistakes, but haven’t you? You cannot save people from life. Life will impact all of us and so will the quality of OUR CHOICES. Don’t keep making choices for grown people like you’re some god who lords control over their lives. Stop messing with their ascent and take off in life. Take your mouth and your hands off of other people’s journey and release them to go as high as they can in life.
There’s a destination awaiting them and they’ll never get to it if you’re busy forcing your plans for them down their throat. Stay out of grown people’s affairs. Mind your business. Your adult children, nieces and nephews are not your business anymore. Be there for them when they need you. Don’t enable. Don’t help them underachieve. Support them from your own seat and please allow them the space to soar. Find your purpose and stop trying to steer other people’s lives. They’ll thank you later,…and you’ll thank me later.
Copyright ©️2019 Sherry Grant
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