What else do you have to lose?

Don’t say you want to go places and live your life in a way that contradicts your own words. It’s time to take charge over your life! Stop talking about what you want to do and where you want to go and never doing anything other than what you’ve always done. Change. The bottom line for any growing adult is to do something different and make a difference in the world.

If you’re always working on your issues, when will you ever make an impact on anyone else? If you can’t make an impact in your own life, how can you help anyone else? It’s scary to think that some people will never get to their destination because they never do the work to see any real transformation in their own lives. Transformed people don’t repeat the same drama and say they want change. I’m worried about people who talk the talk but never walk the walk. Get yourself together please. You’re getting too old to continue doing the same dumb stuff you did when you were younger. Grow up. Get up. Level up. The only other option is to keep doing what you’ve been doing. But we know what that means. Same results. And haven’t we already concluded that you don’t like your current destination? You don’t like not having enough. Not enough money. Not enough quality friends. Not enough strength and motivation to get to your next level. We don’t like this!

So since we know what we are doing isn’t working; let’s try something new! New is where you’re headed. A new diet. New conversations. New ways of thinking and living and even loving. This is going to be good. And it’s going to be amazing going to a new destination. Free yourself of the fear of the unknown. It’s clearly going to be better than what’s been. I’m excited for you. Just go. It’s time you get moving. I’m cheering for you and I’m confident what’s to come is better than what’s been. What else do you have to lose?

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#blogger #travel #therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #destination #new #start #blog #mentality #mindset #go #takeoff

Are you the problem?

Wanna know why most Airport agents are so grumpy? Because they spend all their time trying to help people take flight WHO DON’T WANT TO FOLLOW DIRECTIONS. (Insert churchy music!)

It’s like this whole life is a proverbial airport where people say they want to take flight and they say they want to grow and go to their next level yet every gate they get to, they do everything but cooperate with the instructions given for a successful take off. Then, after they miss their connections and end up stalled, they complain and cry and blame everyone for their lack of application when it comes to the directions they didn’t follow. I was talking to someone the other day who was “praying for me” because they felt concerned that I spend most of my time counseling people. They said they know that it takes a toll on me. I laughed and said to them “My realest life coachable friends aren’t the problem!” I went onto say “They encourage me because I see transformation in them. I see the growth in 80% of them. I see most of them genuinely doing the work necessary to break generational curses and heal broken mentalities.”

Sadly, it’s the “supposedly intelligent and together folk” who I teach and train who seem to be the most stagnant and stuck. Stuck talking about the same drama. Stuck in the same place in every area of their lives. No take off. No growth. It’s sorta depressing when you think about it. That people who think they’re so wonderful are really so pitiful. Ironically, the most bound people I know think they’ve already arrived and when you walk around this airport of life acting as if you’re already “there” who’s going to try and help you? No one in their right mind is going to waste time trying to convince a person who thinks they’re doing great that they aren’t? And if you think you’re doing so well, where else do you really need to go anyway? If you’re already smarter, more profound and wiser than everyone else and if your relationships and ways of handling life are already perfect and you’re living your best life; who are you going to listen to anyway? Who’s qualified to tell you anything?

The most conflicted people I know have this way of thinking that makes them the exception to doing anything more than what they’re doing. They think all of us who take classes, go to therapy, church, the gym, yoga, the library, museums,,on walks and trips are just being extra. And maybe we are. Maybe we are extra ready to go somewhere better than where we’ve been. Maybe we are extra excited about living free from the past and the hurt and the shame and bondage that have so many “together” people living their lives stuck at the airport. Maybe we are extra, but if it’s going to take being extra to unlearn some of the stuff that got us thinking some of the toxic ways we think- ok then! We own it! We are extra!

So yeah, we are going to keep being extra and continue to follow the instructions of other people even if they seem like ordinary airport workers. We are going to honor them and listen to them and respect them because we don’t have to highlight what’s wrong with other people and disqualify them from being able to help us take off in order to feel good about ourselves. That’s silly and not the right mentality to have anyway. We’re going places so we aren’t doing to do anything to hinder our progress so we’re ready to listen to people who have skills, information and training that we admit we don’t have. We will do whatever it takes at this point in our lives not to be stuck at the airport of life complaining about how broke we are; that is emotionally, spiritually and mentally! We are determined not to let anything stop us from getting to our next destination. Say what you want about us but we are going places and we have no problem cooperating with the people assigned to help us get there. Do you know the people who are assigned to help you get to your next level? How are you doing in honoring them along the way? Make it a priority to receive instructions from a posture of honor.

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #mindset #cooperate #blogger #blog #mentality #destination

Who’s Around You & Who’s Down With You Are Two Different Things

It takes a lot of courage to try and take off! Then to try and carry other people to great places,…it’s no joke. You’ve got to be mentally, spiritually and emotionally secure because people will test you! They will try your patience with their fickle ways and head issues. Being a leader is not for the faint of heart. Even a pilot has to come to the realization that his job is to take the aircraft to a specific place no matter how bumpy a ride it may be. A pilot is a leader who takes on the monumental responsibility of transporting passengers to their next destination.

It’s a lot of pressure and weight to carry other people places. Ironically, most of the people who get on board to take flight do so from a place of willingness: meaning no one forces them to step onto the plane. The only people on the plane without their approval are infants and children. Sadly, most of the adult infants I know on this flight called life are the ones who act like someone made them take flight. These big babies are the ones who are constantly complaining about jobs they applied for, spouses they selected and commitments they made! Somewhere along the way, they must have obviously forgotten no one forced them to be anywhere! So many people I know like this are the ones who made their decisions. They chose to be in the situations and relationships they’re in, yet they remain to be the main ones guilty of being non compliant, resistant and uncooperative; even combative when it comes to their own ascent. Why are you fighting against your own elevation? Did you forget you are the one who stepped on board this flight? I’m starting to notice that many of the very people who “follow” certain leadership, follow in a way that makes it difficult for a smooth experience for anyone.

This makes it clear that – Who’s around you and who’s down with you are clearly two different things! Seriously! I’m starting to see the difference in having people around you who bring negative energy versus people who come along side and help to encourage and breathe life into your vision and plans. There is a big difference. Let’s be honest, Leadership is difficult enough. Who needs unsupportive, off-putting patronage? Not anyone who wants to go somewhere great! Being a visionary committed to structuring, planning and coordinating the take off of a thing is hard enough. It’s a sad reality that many leaders are emotionally drained and mentally exhausted because the “helpers” are often very unhelpful. Some people equate support with presence. To be quite honest, just showing up and plopping down in a seat and being strange is not supportive. Don’t tell me you’re not sharp enough to know when your spirit is off! It’s crazy how people act as if they don’t know when they’re adding or subtracting from the life in a room. So many of these emotional vampires who arrive and are only good for draining the energy and vibe in a room and filling it with awkwardness get on my nerves. If there’s anything I can share with my real life coachable friends is remove the opportunity for these leeches of life to keep stealing your joy! It’s that simple. We are getting too old to keep explaining things to people when they know what they’re doing. For my coachable friends, press reset and do a self evaluation on what you bring and into the atmosphere.

There’s enough pressure and adversity a leader has to contend with. No one needs to keep trying to work with obnoxious people. Let karma and Jesus deal with them. If they don’t respect your leadership, let them go be great. You’re going places and you certainly shouldn’t have to fight with the weirdness, attitudes and lack of genuine support and enthusiasm from the people you’re committed to help go to another level. It’s a hard job and many don’t want to do what the average leader signs up to do. If you’ve concluded taking on a leadership role is not for you, that’s cool. Being honest with yourself is sooo important for your own ascent and for the health of whatever you’re connected to.

In the meantime, wherever you find yourself on this flight called life, don’t be difficult and please don’t continue to show up and be a jerk.

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces

Refuel for a proper take off

Today was a rest day. I needed it. You know those kinda days don’t you? The ones where you plan to just rest, restore and reset. So often, those of us who are going places can become so used to moving and doing things that we forget to refuel. Planes can’t take off unless they do the same thing.

Made me wonder how so many people think they can operate off of nothing. No rest, no time to focus on recharging their batteries and yet many people think they’re actually on their way somewhere great?!! The only way any of us are going to be ready for a successful take off is that we get fueled up and ready to go far. Far too many of you reading this are guilty of not sleeping well, eating right or spending time in healthy atmospheres. Some of you are notorious for putting yourselves under tremendous amounts of stress. You are attracted to drama and people who love negativity. You never know what it’s like not to hear people saying toxic things to you. How do you expect to take off when everyone around you is so pessimistic and discouraging? They love to speak death instead of speaking life to you. You stay around these kind of individuals and actually plan on going great places!?! I’m sorry but that’s got to change. It’s time to check yourself and be honest. Are you seriously doing what you need to do in order to be in the right head space for where you want to go? Are your spending habits helpful to your ascent? How about your thinking? Some of you are guilty of thinking about the wrong things all the time. You’re always thinking crazy thoughts. Not good for your mental health or the people around you. Your departure is your responsibility and you can’t go far if you’re not putting the proper fuel in your spiritual, emotional and mental tank. Stop hanging around questionable characters who always make you second guess yourself. Get yourself full of wisdom for where you’re going! Guard your heart and mind and then you’ll begin to have the strength and fortitude needed to do what you haven’t been able to do. In most cases it’s not that you can’t accomplish your goals, it’s just that you’ve been overwhelmed, overworked, and depleted of the energy needed to travel anywhere other than around the block.

You’ve got nations in you! But you can’t conquer them if you sleep like a vampire. You can’t reach the heights set for you if you’re living in some of these strange places. Sofas and basements are ok when you’re in dire circumstances. They’re ok if it’s just a temporary situation, but how long are you going to justify living anywhere? You need a stable environment and a steady schedule. One suitable for an adult! You need one that fits where you’re going. You need discipline over your environment and conversations. You need self control and a proper gauge on who you are before you can reach a new level.

It’s time you get started now. It’s time to fuel up, because there’s greatness awaiting you!

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #travel #boundaries #blog #rest #restore #fueledup #empty #destination #travel #takeoff #people #mentality #mindset

Relax!

As controlling as you are there are certain things you have no control over. You have to sit back and trust that you’ll be fine. This is how I want you to approach your day. If you can learn to exhale and breathe and trust that your life is going in the right direction, that you’re doing your best and trying your hardest to get to your next destination, you’re going to be alright. I believe that for you. That you’ve been doing the necessary work to set your life on the path you need it to be on to get “there.” So now all you need to do is learn to enjoy the ride. Seriously, you stress too much. You worry too much. You overthink things and if there isn’t a problem, you think one up. You really need to stop that. You make it so hard for you to enjoy the journey. In the meantime, you always win, but victory would be a lot sweeter if you stopped stressing and being so anxious. Today, consider this is your reminder to RELAX AND ENJOY THIS FLIGHT!

If you want to keep being all mad and upset all the time, have at it. But if you want to have a great life, then change your attitude and rest in the fact that you’re on your way and you’ll get there soon! In the meantime, do whatever it takes to drown out the negative and focus on the positive.

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #blogger #mentality

Nice Nasty

On my last flight, it was obvious to everyone that one of the flight attendants didn’t have a nice attitude. She was at work, in uniform, doing her job, but something was “off” when it came to her disposition. The way she treated people was not nice. After her awkward and cold greeting to the people she couldn’t help but avoid, she angrily went about her duties being super nice nasty until someone asked her a question. That’s when she couldn’t contain the monster of anger anymore. At that moment it became abundantly clear that this lady had a problem. Something was going on with her emotionally and it was interfering with her ability to function at her best. Sound familiar to anyone else?

This got me to thinking how often I’ve tried to do “my job” and get through whatever it was that I was supposed to be doing without addressing the fact that I had problem going on within. Like the flight attendant who “served” us with a bad spirit, I could easily blame my ugly outlook on other people. But I knew deep down inside that the only way I would conquer this messed up perspective is that I take responsibility for the way I was behaving on this flight called life. Innovative and interesting approach on life right???? Take ownership over my actions! WOW! Cutting edge!! I’m really being sarcastic, but doesn’t it seem like this approach to confronting your issues is no longer even thought of. Oddly enough this is not a popular way of thinking in this culture. It almost seems as if people feel good justifying, defending and excusing their bent mentality. It almost seems the people who need to grow up are surrounded by enablers who viciously support their lameness rather than encouraging them to stop playing and get healed!

The flight attendant on the plane with the crappy attitude was the same way. She had somehow trained all her coworkers to walk on eggshells and do whatever they could to keep her from getting more inflamed and agitated. They were literally allowing her bad attitude to set the temperature and climate for their day. This is something I wholeheartedly refuse to do with anyone in my life. If your attitude sucks, don’t look for me to tell you that it’s cool to behave that way. If you want to be a jerk, don’t expect me to ignore it and act as if you’re going to condition me to tolerate your foolishness. While I completely grasp the concept of unconditional love, I don’t subject myself to toxic behaviors from anyone! I will love you from a distance until you learn to behave yourself properly. It’s often difficult for a toxic person to remain the way they are when they’re around people who hold them accountable. It’s impossible to stay sick in a healthy environment. Could it be that most of the cancerous people in our lives are that way because we haven’t challenged them to get help!!?? Are we coddling them and babying them to the point of supporting their sickness? It’s really important to ask yourself this simple question. We all need to no doubt always stay working on ourselves, but we can’t say we’re partnering with people on this flight called life and never confront the obvious. Like the nice nasty flight attendant, why do we ignore adults around us who behave like children? Why do we constantly excuse the unhealthy attitudes and mindsets of people we say we love as we try to take off in life? Why do we handle things this way and wonder why we are feeling so deflated and depressed as we journey with these emotionally unwell people?

Are we emotionally unwell too!? If we hang out with 4 toxic people, we may actually be the 5th one. It’s not too late to get some help, but the help is not going to contend with your need to be right. If you’re so prideful and determined to be a smart girl or guy, then keep living the way you live. But if you’re sure there’s a better way of living and relating to people on this journey, get around some people that you’ll respect enough to see your need to work on your issues. Your issues and character defects are not anything to feel bad about unless you’re sticking to defending them. If you’re sure you need to be healed and we all do, get in an environment where you can start the process. I’m excited for my real life coachable friends like myself who are headed to a new level. Free of always being offended and having your feelings hurt all the time. Free from having to put your loved ones through the ringer when it comes to your mood swings and emotional fluctuations. I’m so happy you’re headed to a destination where you’re never going to enter a place and have to pretend you’re something you’re not. I’m excited you’re headed somewhere great where you’ll never have to be nice nasty again.

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #nicenasty #attitudes #moods #flight #attendant #blog #blogger #mentality #emotional #mindsets

The soundtrack of someone going somewhere great!

Music helps me take flight! I love listening to great singing and instrumentation when I’m on a plane traveling somewhere! I love inspirational music and even podcast and motivational teaching too. Anything that I listen to when I’m going somewhere new helps me get in the right mindset for where I’m headed.

Made me think how important it is to be selective about what you allow to play in your ear as you try and go great places in life. Many people allow the soundtrack of complaints, frustration, sadness, dysfunction, drama, manipulation and constant confusion to play in the background and wonder why when they arrive to their next destination on this flight called life; they are so very drained, emotionally depleted and in the wrong head space.

What you listen to and who you listen to as you grow and attempt to elevate on your journey will have a great amount of input on your mentality when you arrive. No point in working so hard to get to destination happy, destination marriage, destination the career you’ve dreamed of and when you get there you’re unable to actually enjoy it. Well, if you let negative people with hidden motives and toxic agendas, speak into your life along the way, they will inevitably drop deadly seeds that will undoubtedly poison your peace and potential when you get “there!”

Please hear me when I say – take back control over what you hear and block out the noise of anyone playing anything in your ear that’s in competition with your take off in life. That includes entitled people from your past who feel the need to try and take over your life and plans. Let them know that their assistance regarding what you hear is not needed. Shucks, some of these crazy people who are obsessed with running your life have neglected to assess the lack of health in their own lives! My advice for my real life coachable friends is simple;

1. Take some time to tune out anything playing that’s going to get you stressed out and worked up when you get to your dream destination.

2. While everyone has their own preferences when it comes to what they want to hear, the only soundtrack you can control is the one you listen to. Take care of what you hear and watch how far you go when you get your mind on what you’re responsible for and no one else.

3. Lastly, enjoy the ride! Turn what you love up loud and let it encourage you and inspire you to get where you’ve always dreamed of going.

And when you finally get there, keep rocking out to your favorite sounds. Drown out the critics and the haters and keep soaring until your life lines up with everything you dreamed of! Play it loud! Play it over and over again and let it get you ready for your next level. It’s the soundtrack of someone going somewhere great on this flight called life!

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #travel #takeoff #destination #music #soundtrack #dream #blog #blogger #mentality

If you wanna fly, you’ve gotta give up the stuff that weighs YOU down!

Some of the most annoying people I know are constantly complaining about where they are in life and who stopped them from getting to their destination. They are the perpetual victim and they’re always crying and moaning about what’s wrong in their life. It’s like they’re on repeat mode telling the same version of the story where everyone else is bad and they’re the only one who’s good. These people are emotional vampires and every time you see them it’s the same ole drama and confusion. I’ve learned that if I’m not willing to make the changes needed to see a new reality for my life, then I’m doing the same thing as the complainers who make themselves a victim of their own circumstances. Complaining and never putting in the work to see things change doesn’t make sense!

Change, if you asked me is an inside job. That means no one else is responsible for your life getting better but you. Truth is no one is coming to save you. The bottom line on this flight called life is you have got to save yourself. I know that’s a lot to take in because most people love placing the blame on family and friends and outside sources rather than looking introspectively. Most people feel a lot better shifting the weight on someone else’s shoulders to fix their problems rather than pulling up their sleeves and doing the work associated with changing. When it comes to change you’ve got to aggressively do whatever it takes. And this gruesome process requires most of the effort and work to come from the person who sees the need for it.

I saw a post today on instagram that said “If you wanna fly, you gotta give up that stuff that weighs you down!” Powerful statement and so true. See, the stuff that weighs us down is only weighing us down if we let it. It can only bring you down by choice! People can’t weigh you down unless you give them the power to. Words can’t weigh you down unless you give it the authority over your life! Situations and circumstances can’t weigh you down when all you have to do is remove yourself from toxic relationships and environments when you realize you need to. The burden still goes back to you. What are you doing to change!? If you’re not changing, you’re virtually standing in your own way. Progress is personal and until you’re willing to step up and address the stinking thinking that got you in this place – YOU’RE NOT SERIOUS ABOUT CHANGING!

We are way too intelligent and too old to still be sitting back blaming the way we are on other people. It’s time to grow up and do better. Today’s the first day of the rest of your life! So change. Start working on the best project you’ll ever have and that’s YOU! Not your spouse, children, family and friends. It’s you! You and your super controlling must have it your way self!!Don’t consume another moment of your time trying to make another person in your life your pet project. Get your life right. Work on your money, your health, your mindset, character and integrity. Most of the people I know who are stressed out and anxious all the time are only this way because they’re consumed with other people’s problems. Mind your business and watch things begin to change for you. Some of you are just so nosey and way too worried about trying to control other people’s lives. Make a commitment to get focused and go back to working on what really belongs to you. Your grown family and friends are not your concern. You can pray for them and hope the best but if you’re trying to be their savior you’re not helping them. And if you asked me you’re actually the problem and half the reason they won’t grow up and change. Don’t make other people your excuse for not dealing with your problems. Some people try to work on everyone else around them to avoid working on their issues. Don’t let it be said of you that you’re obsessed with other people while ignoring that you need help!

Get working on your own take off. You can’t carry people who are meant to get their own wings and take flight. Give up your excuses and do what you need to get where you’re supposed to be in life.

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

#therealestlifecoach #goingplaces #travel #mindyourbusiness #change #destination #location #mindset #mentality #people #growth #growup #blogger #blog #marylandblogger

Are you really prepared to go anywhere great?

You and I can dream or want to fly a plane all day long and still not have the credentials and qualifications to do so. I can even pack my bags and want to jump on a flight but still never get access to go. Unless I take the necessary steps to do what’s required of me to take flight – I will still just be sitting around wanting to go somewhere great and end up going absolutely nowhere!!!!

Thinking of this while drinking my morning cup of coffee, made me want to remind my real life coachable friends to go back to doing what’s required of you! Check yourself and make sure you’re doing everything in your power to go somewhere great. There’s a famous quote that says “Talk is cheap!” Indeed this is true! So many people talk so much crap and sure, it sounds good but they never do the things that are necessary to make good on all they say. There are specific REQUIREMENTS all of us have to take in order to take flight!!!

This applies to anything you want to do on this flight called life. From marriage, to family, to work-life and career, you must get up everyday and hustle and be sober enough to realize that before you see the fruits of your labor, you have to wait! The same way a farmer puts a seed in the ground, we have got to get it through our thick skulls that even when we plant the seeds necessary for us to take off – it takes time to see a harvest. And I know, waiting is the hardest thing for this generation to do. This culture is so funny that we complain and think it’s laborious to stand in front of the microwave and wait for a 3 minute TV dinner to cook. It’s hard for many of you even reading this today to swallow this concept. But in the meantime, you’re beating yourself up and wearing your mind out worrying about your plans taking off when the onus is on you. When the bottom line is, if you want to take off the pressure is not on anyone else but you. Basically, all you have to do is work your plan and wait to see it happen. Everything takes time.

Don’t be frustrated. See, if you’re doing all you can that’s required of you to take off in your field, then stopped being so hard on yourself. You need to take it easy and enjoy your journey. Now, I can see if you’re mad at yourself if you’re not doing anything to take off. If you’re sitting around praying and never doing any work, then shame on you. The Bible even says “Faith without works is DEAD!” Don’t act like a victim when you’re doing nothing to even try. Even if you’re doing the minimum, you shouldn’t feel satisfied in your efforts! But, please don’t stay in that place of self defeat. Get up and do better. You can recover! If you’re not doing all you can to operate in excellence, I sincerely believe this article is for you! Stop selling yourself short. Just try! If you’re watering down who you are because you don’t want to come off as “too much” this message is for you! Stop worrying about how people perceive you and go for your dreams. If you’re doing what you do from a pure place, here’s your reminder to mash the gas! Go hard!! Don’t allow your creativity and greatness to sit on the shelf while you cry, moan and still do nothing. Put your gifts to work for you.

There is something you can do today that you’ve been putting off doing. Some of you spend way too much time thinking. You overthink and overreact! You spend too much time in your head and not enough time doing anything that impacts the world. This is not the time to set on your laurels! If someone is resting on their laurels, they appear to be satisfied with the things they have achieved and have stopped putting effort into what they are doing. Don’t get let yesterday’s success make you complacent today. I hope and pray you get where you want to go but you must do something more than talk. You must do what’s required of you! You my friend are headed somewhere great and this is your Monday morning reminder that it’s up to you. How far you go and when you go, it’s all in your hands. Make a choice today to do what’s required and make the maximum effort to go somewhere great! Go! The world is waiting on you! Are you really prepared to go somewhere great?!

#therealestlifecoach #flight #required #takeoff #people #mentality #mindset #go #restingonyourlaurels #choose #destination

Take care of you and then take off on your haters!

There was this airline called WOW and one day they were set up at the airport doing business. One day they were taking people up and getting them to their destination and then literally the next day they were gone. Gives a new meaning to their name WOW! Just like that no signs of them anywhere!

You know people like that don’t you? One day they’re all up in your face. One day they’re your bff, you can do no wrong, they’ll never leave your side, they’re your ride or die, friend til the end; then the next day where are they? These same people; the WOW people in your life – VANISHED. I used to continue trying to stay in relationships with WOW type people. Then one day I realized how important it is to keep my personal commitment to myself and that is never beg anyone to be in your life Sherry! Not anyone! I just woke up one day and realized that forcing WOW relationships of any kind went against everything within me. This goes for friends, family, church, community, business,…if it doesn’t organically work, I don’t force it. Not friendships or anything for that matter. If it’s not a mutually reciprocated connection, it doesn’t mean anything is wrong, it just doesn’t make me want to go there!

This made me think about how much further we could all be on this flight called life if we stopped wasting time trying to make connections with people that don’t genuinely care about us or want to stay in touch with us. See, anyone can act as if they’re busy and say they want to be in your life; but as my mother would say “whatever we love to do – we find time to do!” It’s so true. Don’t buy the load of crock that comes from phony people when they say they miss you and do nothing to make time for you. No one is that busy! There’s always time to connect with people you want to connect with. Once I found myself always being the one reaching out and making the effort I had this peace in my spirit that said just STOP. Don’t explain yourself. Don’t try anymore. You’ve been the one trying all along. You ever felt that? And no I’m not talking about becoming some paranoid or suspicious spooky person, but you can almost feel the other person not being sincere in their pursuit of a commitment to you. This type of discernment is so important for those of you who are going places. You’ve got to develop that deep sensitivity and insight to see the heart of people you’re dealing with. You’re going to need to be able to discern if the person is having some head issues that’s above your pay grade. See, the problem with some of these people is not that they don’t like you. The issue is they like you too much. And when you find a person who can’t stand your guts, no matter how much you try, they can’t be your friend let alone go to the next level with you. You can’t do anything great with someone who’s secretly jealous of you. Some of these people can’t stay in touch with you and be in your life consistently because they don’t like how blessed you are. There I said it. They don’t want to hear all the good stuff that’s happening in your life. They can’t call you or text you because they’ve been talking about you and the guilt associated with speaking to you with your “pure heart” eats them alive. I’m telling you that you need to settle your spirit and stop letting your imagination run wild about maybe something you’ve done. The only thing you’ve done is offended them with your advancement. That’s why they stopped talking to you. It’s not you. It’s them. Their insecurities won’t let them stay connected to you. It’s no accident you’re reading this article today, you needed this confirmation about why even some family members have pulled away from you. It’s not because you’re going to church now or back in school getting your life together. It’s because they’re hating on you. It’s not because you’re married now and they want to give you space to be with your spouse. It’s not because you’re a new parent and your kid is beautiful, healthy and doing well! It’s because they’re upset about your take off! Stop feeling obligated to keep kissing the behinds of fake people who don’t even have enough depth to be happy for you. You! After all you’ve been through they can’t celebrate you? That’s the sad part because as long as you were struggling they didn’t have a problem with you. But now they’re suddenly too busy to hear about the good things happening in your life. Don’t keep tolerating their emotional mismanagement of your heart.

Family is more than just tradition!!! As a matter of fact, family and friendship is much more than a network of obligations! It is a deep commitment to treating other people the way you want to be treated. Made me start asking myself; why do I have to always be the bigger person if you’re supposed to be committed to me too? Nah fam. That’s not cool. If I’m going somewhere great and I am, I need to take note of how people handle my heart at this level. If you can’t honor me now, don’t expect to have an opportunity to be close to me when I get promoted.

Today is the first day of August! This is a day of promotion. This is a the 8th month representing new beginnings. Don’t start a new beginning doing the same stuff that broke your heart in the past. Make a commitment to stay close to people who stay committed to you. These vanishing connections aren’t good for your mental health. Take care of you and then take off on your haters!

Copyright ©️2019 Sherry Grant

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