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People know what they’re doing. They know the energy they bring when they come around you. They know when they’re being supportive. They know when they aren’t. Don’t ever let someone make you ignore what you see going on right in front of you. You’re not crazy when the same people who smile up in other people’s faces look at you like you have five heads when you speak. It’s time you stopped going where you’re tolerated and start being intentional about relationships and atmospheres that celebrate you!

There is this tendency in many people to make concessions for people, to be more accommodating of crap than you’re required to. Maybe it’s the programming that tells you to be a bigger person. What does that even mean anyway? It’s going to be extremely difficult to take off in life if you’re constantly tolerating the dishonor and foolishness of people who know what they’re doing to you. In the meantime, you’re teaching people how to MISTREAT you and setting yourself up for a lot of regret later. You’re going to one day realize you deserved to be treated better than you allowed yourself to be treated. There is this sad and distorted programming that society, toxic families and even religion has taught us and that is to lie. Lie about how you really feel. Pretend you’re ok with things you’re not ok with. Let people slide when they keep showing you that you’re not important to them. If you asked, that’s no way to live. There’s no way you can reach your highest level of potential pretending not to see all the fakeness around you. The insincere smiles and the people who half love you. You see that. The ones who want you to be there for them, but the love is not mutual. There’s no way to advance and become the person you were destined to be hanging out with people who can’t be real with you to save their life.

It’s time out for tolerating passive aggressive people who never tell the truth but instead use outright meanness, negative body language and silence to punish you for being you. Let people choose the people they respect. Kindly remove yourself from friendships and family fakeness and choose environments that encourage you to be your true self. Psychology teaches that we show people what we like about them by what we encourage and at the same time we discourage them when they say and do things we don’t approve of. Your friends and family do that. As long as you meet their needs they love you. The minute you are no longer available or helpful to their agenda you’re the worse person in the world.

Could you be suppressing who you are because you feel the covert rejection of people around you who don’t want the real you to show up. Instead, they would prefer a version of you that serves them best. They want you to lie on your back and let them dictate the terms of the relationship. No thanks! I’m not willing to play a role for anyone. Nobody. I’m not willing to continually help people ascend and take off emotionally and mentally and they never offer anything of substance back to me. I am not the one. People want you to help them become stronger and bolder in making their way to their next destination only to find there’s no reciprocity in return. Let’s be real – Some of our bonds are not healthy. There are people who devalue all the good we do for them, meanwhile in their minds they can only find respect for the people in their lives who they think are worthy.

I’m good at this point with accepting things for what they are. That’s an important part of life. Accepting reality and people for who they are. Some of these bougie wanna be people around you are attached to you because you are the only person who resembles real. They live their fake lives pretending to have their act together when in private they are on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Let them deal with their duplicity. Let them pretend to be so together for Instagram. We all know the real deal. As for me, no longer will I force anything. If seeing is believing I can see who’s flying with me and who’s looking for a more beneficial way up! Opportunist. The religious world is filled with people who love to get close to people for the purposes of stealing and cloning. It’s all good though. We need all kinds of people to help us evolve. We need the people who try to act like they’re down with us for as long as they can to get enough courage to try to do what we do. I see it all the time. They can steal your recipe but it never turns out the same.

At the end of the day; we all need to grow and come to the realization that no matter what we are to people it doesn’t guarantee they’ll be that back to us. As real as I am to some people, it doesn’t mean I’ll ever get that back. I still press on being the most authentic and genuine version of myself possible. I encourage my real life coachable friends to do the same. Breathe. Look around. See people for who they are. Don’t be so naive either where you let your efforts get trampled on by people who aren’t interested in valuing you and what you add to their lives. You’ll thank me later. These are your travel instructions while grounded.

Copyright © Sherry Grant 2020

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