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On my last flight, it was obvious to everyone that one of the flight attendants didn’t have a nice attitude. She was at work, in uniform, doing her job, but something was “off” when it came to her disposition. The way she treated people was not nice. After her awkward and cold greeting to the people she couldn’t help but avoid, she angrily went about her duties being super nice nasty until someone asked her a question. That’s when she couldn’t contain the monster of anger anymore. At that moment it became abundantly clear that this lady had a problem. Something was going on with her emotionally and it was interfering with her ability to function at her best. Sound familiar to anyone else?

This got me to thinking how often I’ve tried to do “my job” and get through whatever it was that I was supposed to be doing without addressing the fact that I had problem going on within. Like the flight attendant who “served” us with a bad spirit, I could easily blame my ugly outlook on other people. But I knew deep down inside that the only way I would conquer this messed up perspective is that I take responsibility for the way I was behaving on this flight called life. Innovative and interesting approach on life right???? Take ownership over my actions! WOW! Cutting edge!! I’m really being sarcastic, but doesn’t it seem like this approach to confronting your issues is no longer even thought of. Oddly enough this is not a popular way of thinking in this culture. It almost seems as if people feel good justifying, defending and excusing their bent mentality. It almost seems the people who need to grow up are surrounded by enablers who viciously support their lameness rather than encouraging them to stop playing and get healed!

The flight attendant on the plane with the crappy attitude was the same way. She had somehow trained all her coworkers to walk on eggshells and do whatever they could to keep her from getting more inflamed and agitated. They were literally allowing her bad attitude to set the temperature and climate for their day. This is something I wholeheartedly refuse to do with anyone in my life. If your attitude sucks, don’t look for me to tell you that it’s cool to behave that way. If you want to be a jerk, don’t expect me to ignore it and act as if you’re going to condition me to tolerate your foolishness. While I completely grasp the concept of unconditional love, I don’t subject myself to toxic behaviors from anyone! I will love you from a distance until you learn to behave yourself properly. It’s often difficult for a toxic person to remain the way they are when they’re around people who hold them accountable. It’s impossible to stay sick in a healthy environment. Could it be that most of the cancerous people in our lives are that way because we haven’t challenged them to get help!!?? Are we coddling them and babying them to the point of supporting their sickness? It’s really important to ask yourself this simple question. We all need to no doubt always stay working on ourselves, but we can’t say we’re partnering with people on this flight called life and never confront the obvious. Like the nice nasty flight attendant, why do we ignore adults around us who behave like children? Why do we constantly excuse the unhealthy attitudes and mindsets of people we say we love as we try to take off in life? Why do we handle things this way and wonder why we are feeling so deflated and depressed as we journey with these emotionally unwell people?

Are we emotionally unwell too!? If we hang out with 4 toxic people, we may actually be the 5th one. It’s not too late to get some help, but the help is not going to contend with your need to be right. If you’re so prideful and determined to be a smart girl or guy, then keep living the way you live. But if you’re sure there’s a better way of living and relating to people on this journey, get around some people that you’ll respect enough to see your need to work on your issues. Your issues and character defects are not anything to feel bad about unless you’re sticking to defending them. If you’re sure you need to be healed and we all do, get in an environment where you can start the process. I’m excited for my real life coachable friends like myself who are headed to a new level. Free of always being offended and having your feelings hurt all the time. Free from having to put your loved ones through the ringer when it comes to your mood swings and emotional fluctuations. I’m so happy you’re headed to a destination where you’re never going to enter a place and have to pretend you’re something you’re not. I’m excited you’re headed somewhere great where you’ll never have to be nice nasty again.

Copyright ©️ 2019 Sherry Grant

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